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Writings  How
to Live Life to the Fullest: A Personal Coach's Guide |
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Becky Pine ©1999 |
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1. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS |
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A recent study found that the feeling most strongly
correlated with life satisfaction was not happiness, success,
or love, but rather gratitude. Begin now to appreciate all the
big and small things that make your life enjoyable and fulfilling.
Savor a beautiful landscape, a pleasant memory stirred by the
song on the radio, the warmth of the sun on your back, a compliment
from a colleague, kindness from a stranger, or a hug from a
loved one. |
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2. BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF |
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All 12-step self-help programs advise conducting
a "searching and fearless moral inventory" of yourself.
Evaluate yourself honestly, listing both strengths and weaknesses.
Forget the pejorative put-downs and forgive the past mistakes.
Then use your strengths to overcome your flaws. Change is always
possible, if you use your self-knowledge. |
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3. ACT YOUR AGE |
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Take responsibility for your actions. Be the
adult and make mature decisions, especially when the choices
are difficult. Invite input from children, friends, and relatives
on matters that affect them, but be clear that you will make
your own decisions based on all the wisdom and maturity you
have. Not everyone will agree with you, but this will be true
no matter what decisions you make. Making decisions in alignment
with your values and principles is the path to true respect
and self-esteem. |
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4. PREVENT STRESS |
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Stop trying to manage your stress. Start reducing
it instead. Better yet prevent it. Set limits if you are constantly
expected to do more than is humanly possible. Say no to excessive
demands from others, or from your own internal perfectionist
voice. Your first priority is to care for yourself so that you
will be able to do what is required of you. Write and rehearse
ways to say no graciously, to delegate to others, or to decline
more than your share of responsibilities. Then use them. |
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5. NURTURE YOUR SPIRITUAL SELF |
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Strengthen your connection with God, a Higher
Power, the Great Spirit, or your personal spirituality. The
mysteries of life, death, creation and the universe may never
be fully understood by human beings, but all great religions
and philosophers teach that the process of seeking wisdom and
guidance, and of living life according to one's beliefs is the
best definition we have of the purpose of life. Spend time daily
in prayer, meditation, or spiritual development. |
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6. TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY |
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Your body is the only possession you will have
with you for your entire life. Treat it well and this marvelous
creation will reward you with good health and dependable service.
Fuel it with a nutritious diet, protect it from harm and contamination,
maintain it with regular exercise, allow it plenty of rest and
recuperation, and pay attention to the messages it sends you
when it needs medical attention. |
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7. CONQUER YOUR BAD HABITS |
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Whether it be smoking, drinking, gambling, biting
your nails, criticizing others, overeating, overspending, letting
your emotions sabotage you, or some other form of harmful habitual
behavior, resolve now to end it and replace it with healthful
self-caring behaviors. Even if you've tried unsuccessfully before,
try again. Make this be the time you succeed. Focus on the present,
abstaining one day at a time. |
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8. GIVE GENEROUSLY |
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Share what you have -your talents, skills, time
and financial wealth- as much as you can manage. Contribute
your energy to a worthwhile project, volunteer to help your
neighbors, share your ideas on problem-solving committees, and
spend time freely with friends and loved ones. Mahatma Ghandi,
Mother Teresa, and Martin Luther King proved that even those
who have nothing can change the world when they join together
and give of themselves. |
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9. KEEP YOUR WORD |
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Be careful about making commitments and diligent
about keeping them. Don't make promises with 'never' or 'always'
in them; they may be impossible to keep. Better to tell an aging
parent, "I will make sure you are well cared for"
than "I will never put you in a nursing home." Show
up on time for appointments. Acknowledge and apologize for your
mistakes. Remember that your word will mean nothing unless it
is demonstrated by your actions. |
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10. TALK ABOUT YOUR PROBLEMS |
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"Life is difficult". So begins M. Scott
Peck's long-term best-seller, The Road Less Traveled. No one
has a problem-free life. The best way to solve problems big
or small is to talk about them. Minimizing, denying, or keeping
difficult things bottled up inside inevitably takes a toll.
Don't let embarrassment, guilt, or shame prevent you from finding
a trusted friend, professional counselor, or spiritual guide
to discuss what is bothering you. Talking sheds new light on
the problem from another person's perspective and eventually
helps you make better decisions about what to do. |
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11. LEARN SOMETHING NEW |
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Challenge yourself. Take a class in a new field
for you. Even what you weren't 'good at' in school can be fun
and easy when you choose to do it, without the pressure of being
graded. Expand your knowledge, increase your skills, keep your
brain and body working, and re-experience the humility of being
a beginner at something. Longevity research has proven the importance
of an active mind to old-age happiness. |
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12. HAVE FUN |
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Having fun enhances both physical and mental
health. Who says you need kids to enjoy splashing in the waves,
making a snow man, blowing bubbles, flying kites, shooting baskets,
roasting marshmallows, or solving puzzles? Indulge yourself
in spontaneous pleasures that don't cost money, increase guilt,
or cause harm to your body, just for the fun of it. Volunteer
for child-care if you need help losing your adult inhibitions. |
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| Becky Pine |
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100 Hollis Street
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Groton, MA 01450
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(978) 448-8700
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